Thursday, January 27, 2011

Yo Quiero salt, chili pepper, onion powder, tomato powder, oats, soy lectithin, sugar, soybean oil, garlic powder, yeast extract, citric acid and cocoa powder.

Have you ever been 3 cars deep at the Taco Bell drive-through and wondered
'What's in that delicious beef'
Me either so the resulting lawsuit from the Montgomery law firm is frivolous at best. The suit claims that when Taco Bell thins their meat by adding fillers, it gives them a competitive advantage over other chains. Really, doesn't the fact that TB only has four basic ingredients and have managed a belly blitz on the U.S. by selling that cheap meat with lettuce, sour cream and cheese and changing the name from Gordita to Chalupa?

Does this mean that we have an abundance of lawyers with legs dangling under mahogany desks, sitting proudly below their framed document from Stanford or Seminole County Night Law School dreaming up lawsuits?

Maybe the greatest course of action we should take is to not let any yahoo into law school just because he or she has the $85k loan and enough pencils to chew on. We have other more expedient issues to deal with
and the fact that Beasley, Allen, Crow, Methvin, Portis & Miles have enough time on their grubby little lawyer hand befuddles me completely.

Maybe I am harboring some ill will at the fact that I was rejected from Harvard Law way back in '86, or maybe it's just the fact that when three cars deep in the Taco Bell drive-through the last thing on my mind is  "I wonder what is in this delicious beef."

Maybe Someday Ruth's Chris Steakhouse will open a drive through and then we can rest easy knowing that while driving, eating and texting at the same time, at least the quality of dead cow will be high and hopefully just dead cow.

you may now kiss the bride and your order is ready.


  1. Is there any doubt that it's a clear-cut case of beef-envy from a squadron of McD lawyers? Don't get all litigious on us, boys. Just make your beef more delicious than theirs. Put morphine in it, if you have to.

  2. I'm surprised people are surprised by this revelation. At least its not dung in the tacos. I remember a few years ago I saw a documentary that claimed there were more cow feces in the burgers at McDonalds/BK than actual meat. Yummy!

  3. what is it? too many lawyers or not enough work, sugar? but then again, what is in that delicious beef? xoxoxoo

  4. UB - first of all how is the noggin?
    The shot fired across the bow in
    the latest version of fast food war aka who will make us fatter while fattening their wallets.

    Jennifer - Was that movie 'Food Inc.' Dung!!!!

    Savannah - both, we have more law students in school than practicing lawyers is the U.S.
    I think Jennifer had it right, it is DUNG

  5. oh, gross, so THAT's what gives the mcd patty that extra snippit of flavor!!!! now i'm going to be sick!

  6. did anyone really think there was beef in it? seriously... i'm surprised it's even 1/3 cow parts...